The Warriors Movie Site Forum

Ajax 13 year old boy, a drunken father and a poor mother.

Father: Ajax, AJAX!!!!! get up!!
(ajax wakes with a headache)
Father:Don't make me punch you in tha face again like what i did last night!
Ajax: Ok.....dad a feww.....morre seconds......
(Ajaxs dad comes up to his room)
Father: Ajax i'll come up in there with a bat now get dressed for school!
Ajax: I hate school i always get picked on
Father:well whip there ass you have to get a education
Ajax whats so great about school?
(ajax's dad walks in his room and grabs him by the neck)
Father:if you don't go to school i'll use u as dart practice
(ajax quickly gets out of bed and goes to the kitchen)
Ajax:what are we having for breakfest i wonder?
Father:make it yourself kid i'm to tired
Ajax:whatever
(ajax makes breakfest)
a few minutes pasts by and ajax is on the bus to school
Kid1:ajax headsup
(ajax looks up and notices that a book is flying through the air,hits him in the face)
(kids start laughing)
that minute ajax gets up and nails the kid in the face
Ajax:try doing that again you you chicken nugget!
(the bus stops)
bus driver:ajax sit down and shutup!!
Ajax:yesmam
Kid1:i'll meet you at the pole 3:00 after school
after school at the flag pole
Ajax:where are they
voice:right behind you
(ajax turns around)
(5 friends appear)
Kid1:lets fight ajax
Ajax:your such a wimp
Part 2 coming soon

i need to make it longer part 2 will be good tomorrow

It,s nice but i'm not sure Ajax's real name is Ajax, keep written

This is cool. I want to see what happens next with Ajax and Kid1. Keep writing! 

I enjoyed it, put some more suspense. Like fast -paced action. Keep writing buddy.

its preety cool. i cant imagine ajax actually being called well. "ajax" at 13 even lol

but keep writing its preety good so far! 

(ajax stands there stunned)
Kid1:well well you wanna fight ajax come get some
(the kids are holding bats)
Ajax to himself:(i got to think of somethin to say)
Ajax:I'll shove those bats up....up your but
(silence occurs)
Kid1:ok
Kid1:lets get him!!!!
(the kids run at him)
(ajax runs to an alley)
Ajax:oh shit!!!
(Ajax stares at a wall)
Kid1:well ajax your cornered
(ajax looks around and finds a knife)
Ajax:back off i'll stab ever one of ya'll
(kids back up instead of kid 1)
Kid 1:you are the most stupidest kid on the planet ajax
(kid 1 runs to him swingin the bat)
(ajax throws knife at him and curves up in a ball)
(silence comes back)
kid 2: you asshole you killed him!!!!!
kid 1:som..e.....one ......get HELP
(kid 1 chokes to death)
Ajax:i didn't mean to!
(ajax runs home crying)
Father: hey ajax how was school
(ajax is still crying)
Ajax:Ddad ii need help
Father:What happened
Ajax:i i kil
(police knock on the door)
Police1:open up this is the police!!!!!
Father:ok hold on
Police1:we need you to come to downtown
Ajax:mme?
Police1:no your dad
Father:Oh shit!!!
(father runs to his room and takes out a shotgun)
Father:get the (bad word deleted) out of my house!
Police1: hes got a gun!
Police2:traquilazir him
(father drops to the floor)
Police1:take him in
(police cuff him and put him in the car)
Ajax:........What the?
Part 3 coming soon

i'll realy need to make this longer

yeah its a little too short. but sometimes less is more. and its still preety good! keep it up.

This is good. I really want to see what happens with Ajax and his dad. Keep writing man!

Yo, I'm just warning u now, keep on cursing, even using * in them, u'll get banned !

i hope part 3 comes soon i like this story but ajax sounds a little bit to soft

Ajax does sound a little soft, but I support this decision for several reasons. One being creative license, which everyone has a right to, even when using well-known characters, and the second being that Ajax is young here, this could be before he was a tough guy. I was just like this version of Ajax until I was 14, that's when I started fighting back, and became harder. And my second point here, is that a lot you think that Ajax isn't his real name, but in light of how his dad acts, I think it's entirely possible that Ajax could in fact ne his real name. His dad could possibly have named him after the hard-bum greek warrior, hoping he would grow up to be strong. Just a thought, sometimes ya gotta read between the lines to understand things, and make up stuff yourself as you read. I find that reading is more enjoyable that way. Anyways dude, awesome story, keep writing.

Wow, i would never of thought of that! Ajax sounds soft, and the parts are short but good job, if this is ur first time.

This story is great man! Keep it up!!