The Smokestack Lightning

[StickWarrior]

The sound of converse slapped on the street in a hypnotizing rhythm. Leaves crunched on the battered pavement and the smell of salt wafted through the air. This was Asbury Park but this was NOT its heyday.  The crowds have moved on, most to Ocean City or Wildwood.  The sky cast gray and seemed to convey a feeling of lost hope that permeated the husks of long since dead buildings.
“So, you ready man?â€

[Scotty Rave]

Great start, jumping right into the action there. It's rather well written and has a lot of potential, so don't make us wait too long for part two. By the way, that's a very creative gang name. 

[StickWarrior]

Thanks, I got the name from the Yardbirds though. I'm still working on part two but in the mean time, here's some pictures of Asbury Park.

This is the old casino building


And this is the old carousel house I'm talking about.

[StickWarrior]

Alright, here's part two. If anyone isn't familar with Asbury Park I have notes at the end.

John was on the ground, his nose dripping blood. West stood over him, his foot raised to deliver a rib crushing kick. The five men leaning on the walls cheered him on.  “Get ‘em West, come on!â€

[Cowboy Is Cool]

Wow, this story is definitely good. I really like the name too, and it was cool how you jumped right into the action like that. Keep up the good work!

[StickWarrior]

Part Three! I know it's short.

After a long night of drinking and listening to music the Smokestack Lightning dispersed into the cool night air. It was about two ‘o clock in the morning and, as if it were possible, the streets looked even more desolate and empty.  A shiver ran up John’s spine, he pulled his jacket closer to himself.
“Hey, watch the new threads.â€

[Baby Bear]

Yes this is a good story. Keep going. I haven't seen you right any stories in so long.

[Scotty Rave]

Fantastic job so far. The chapters are short, which is good when it's on the net when you consider that you can't just slip in a bookmark at the sentence you were on before. I like the way the plot is quickly picking up and it looks like things are getting intense. I can't wait to see more! 

[StickWarrior]

Part four, hope you enjoy

“Man, it’s the cops!â€

[Scotty Rave]

I loved the confrontation there, and I can't wait to see what John does.

[StickWarrior]

It was morning and the waves crashed on the beach for only the lonely to see. Seagulls flew in circles still hoping for careless tourists to leave something behind.  They were probably the most optimistic beings in Asbury Park.
John looked out over the scene while Cyclone walked up to him. “You were right, “he said, “The gas station was empty. I siphoned out some gas for ‘ya.â€

[Scotty Rave]

Holy smeg...a tampon-bomb?! That's genius!  :badgrin: You're a madman after my own heart!

[StickWarrior]

Sorry about the length of this one, I know it's short
Cyclone walked up to Tilly. It was about eleven ‘o clock that night.
“Tilly, this kid John. He’s gonna do something you’re gonna like tonight.â€

[Baby Bear]

Its good. Im surprised by that tampon bomb. I never seen that kind of thing before and yeah its unique and creative. No flaws in your story keep goin'.

[Scotty Rave]

Great new chapter. Seems that John's position in the gang is solidified, and the tampon bomb was a really creative stroke there. Hope to see more soon.